3pm 5th November
Initial thoughts on this book are what the fuck was I thinking?! It’s huge. How am I supposed to carry this mammoth book around with me?
For anyone reading this that doesn’t know, Illumine is a book that’s essentially a story told in documents. So when you’re reading it, you’re reading hacked files that feature top secret documents, interviews and emails. & there isn’t actually any traditional dialogue or following of the main character in their head if that makes sense?
I’ve started reading and managed to get to page 26 before passing out because I was super tired last night but so far I love it! It’s original but I feel like it reminds me of S by Doug Durst & JJ Abrams. Except for the production value of S seem’s so much better because the pages are printed in colour with any notes made in different colours ink so you can tell who’s talking. In Illuminae you can see from the way the documents are shaded there is meant to be the illusion of colour but it just makes me really aware that it’s reprinted black and white so takes away from the experience just a smidge.
It does give you blueprints and maps which really helps add to the visualisation of the world as like I said, there’s no descriptive passages or world-building outside of the documents!
So it’s like, 4 days later!! It turned out to be a busy week and I still havent got past page 26. Does this happen to anyone else? You finally get a week of quiet that you can really get into your books and boom, family end up sick, you need to work and then general chores just take priority?
I think, I’m going to have to just leave this and post a review if I ever actually manage to finish the book!
In the mean time though, has anyone reading this read it already? I mean that’s a stupid question, everyone in the world has probably read it by now? It’s been out for a while and the hype around this series is immense!
So, how did you like it? Does it get easier to get into the way the story is told? Does it get easier to carry around on the train? These are the questions I need answers to!
I don’t know what got into me this month, but I was like lets buy some books. & it started off with me just downloading one book onto my Kindle. Which was Warcross by Marie Lu and I loved it! So once I had finished that, I was on a YA kick. More specifically a Marie Lu kick! I downloaded Legend, read it in like 2 days then downloaded Prodigy which I’m currently reading.
Prodigy is a bit slower for me than Legend for some reason. I have read half of Prodigy before and just never really got into it. This time I’m a bit more invested in the characters and I’m following the plot a bit better so I’m making more progress but it’s still slow. I keep thinking I’ve read over half of it but then look at the percentage I’ve read and it’s only 28%.
Since I had bought all Kindle books, I went to Dymocks and decided to pick up Illuminae by Jay Kristoff & Amie Kaufman. Which is fucking HUGE. But I’m excited to read it because I completely missed all the hype around it last year. Along with Illuminae I bought Genuine Fraud by E. Lockhart. I read We Were Liars by Lockhart a good few years ago but I remember loving it so much I recommended it to everyone that would listen. So I’ve been eyeing it up for a while and decided to finally buy it!
Because I bought Illuminae and Genuine Fraud before I’m finished Prodigy I really, really just want to start one of them! But because this happened with Prodigy before I’m trying to push through and just get past the boring formalities that come along with the second book in a trilogy. Especially dystopian series, you know that world building part where we see how the dystopia came to be? But in an unusually drawn out way? Yeah. You know what I mean.
Annnnyway! They’re they books I purchased in October! & the ones I’m planning on reading into the start of November! I had wanted to focus on some Halloween inspired reads but I got distracted by Marie Lu and her amazing worlds. & Dymocks and their amazing sales.
What will you be reading to finish off October?
TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY. I’m a very youthful 25 because the years I spent smoking didn’t affect me at all. (that’s confession number 1.) & I say that with a heavy sarcasm because it did affect me! Massively! So let’s talk about the other 24 confessions!
- I was so eager to lose my virginity & prove a point to myself that I lost it on a couch with some dude I didn’t even really like/know.
- I spent 6 months arguing with my parents about my life because I was angry with what I chose to do with it. We can laugh about it now, but it was a waste of 6 months.
- I never thought I’d have to plan a life past 23/4/5 because I was convinced I’d never get that old. Not in a morbid way, I just wanted to be Peter Pan, I guess?
- I did however, have BIG plans for my early 20’s. Acting, owning a business, living in L.A. needless to say these were unrealistic and not actual dreams I’d ever want to pursue!
- I’ve lied to the police about my name to get out of getting in trouble. (nothing serious it was a noise complaint & I was like 15, shat my pants and called myself Clare Lawler.)
- My dad left when I was 5. & the world put immense pressure on me to feel it. Even though I didn’t and I always felt like I never missed out, I felt pressured into dealing with it.. If that makes sense?
- In my 24th year, he got in contact with me. & I shat my pants. (PS there might be a lot of shitting pants in this post!)
- I used to lie to friends and family about plans I had so I could stay home and read. I have no regrets.
- I forced myself to be in too many relationships that kept other people happy & not me.
- I ended too many relationships because I was bored with the other person.
- I have never been in a long term relationship & currently am in my 1st. 2.5 years in I haven’t ran away yet! GO TEAM
- In my life, I have made many, many friends but only 5 real ones have stuck around.
- Parents divorcing at 23 isn’t any easier than any other age. It may in fact be worse.
- Sometimes when I’m sad or stressed I masturbate to calm down.
- Thinking of 25 confessions is fucking hard.
- I have a memory of sexual assault. But I was so young I don’t know if it was a dream or not. So don’t talk about it.
- I’ve developed an addiction to coffee!
- But it’s better than my addiction to smoking which I quit btw!
- I complain all the time about being chubby, but never make the changes i need to to loose the extra chub.
- Realising that I’m allowed to do things for me has been life changing.
- The only reason I moved to Australia was because I won a radio contest & my boyfriend at the time dumped me.
- I still am not fully comfortable with my own body. Not weight wise, I mean when I look at my face or skin or hair, I don’t like it.
- Contradicting 22, there are obviously days where I wake up like fuck yes I look fantastic today! & those days are the good ones.
- LAST ONE. I’m in denial that I’m actually 25. & when people ask I automatically say 23. HAH I wish I was still 23 because I’m terrified of going back to uni as a late 20 something student.
There we have it friends. 25 confessions about my 25 years on this earth as a human.
It’s no secret that I’m a strong advocate of treat yo’self. Friends know that if they want to buy something and need confirmation that they should buy it then I’m the girl to talk to! I can rationalise spending money quicker than I can spend the money.
But even in instances that aren’t about a purchase.. Tomorrow is my birthday, the big 25 & around my birthday I get very, liberal with what I can eat. I adopt a ‘life’s too short’ mentality & with that have asked that my girlfriend makes me pancakes, that work get me a chocolate cake & told myself despite having cereal already today I can buy a cheese toastie to go with my coffee.
Do I care? Not necessarily. But it’s just such a happy time in my life. Guilt free eating! Guilt free shopping & guilt free lounging around in my pyjamas watching Moana. Again. For the 5th time.
When it’s close to your birthday, do you treat yourself with anything?
I’m not one for doing plot recaps and book introductions, so if you don’t know what Warcross is about, here’s the brief rundown.
Set in the future, a virtual reality ‘game’ has taken over the world and is so popular it’s essentially a way of life. The creator Hideo is a billionaire and enlists the help of Emika, a young hacker/ bounty hunter to help him find a hacker that’s glitching out the VR world of Warcross and trying to sabotage the final games.
The hackers online name is Zero & that’s what we’ll call them for now! Zero is elusive; from the very start we are lead to question everyone that Emika meets because she’s suspicious at everyone. Until she narrows it down a bit and eliminates some options I was convinced it was the wrong person. Which was great because it kept me guessing and I didn’t get bored! (I’ll talk more about the people later)
The world that Lu created was AMAZING to me because it’s just scary that that’s where we are heading! When I stop and think of all the companies fighting to bring out the next big move in virtual reality, how long will it take for us to actually live in a virtual world?Where we sit at home and can work in a virtual office with virtual people from all over the world? It kinda fascinates me & Warcross just captured the world perfectly.
Hideo the billionaire, he’s strange. This is where the spoilers kick in guys so if you don’t want to be ruined. Turn away!
He’s strange because he’s build up to be this restrained but lovely person. Like you can tell he has issues and it’s almost like.. So, you know when you find out a villain had a redeeming quality? It’s that but in reverse! You find out that Hideo’s brother disappeared while they played together one day & he takes it hard (obviously, I mean.. he lost his brother. I’d be messed up too) BUT that’s the reason why Hideo thinks he can roll out a new technology that will stop people from committing crime. A good gesture, but takes away people’s free will! A thing Emika has a problem with because she committed a crime, but it was in defence of a friend.
I should say, Hideo and Emika get it on a bit which isnt a surprise! BUT I’m calling it now, that Emika actually falls in love with Zero in the next books. & it will be a love triangle-ish. Oh yeah, it will be an awkward triangle because Zero is actually Hideo’s missing brother! & hacked the game to try and stop the mind control techniques that Hideo was planning!
& with that my friends, I’m off to download Legend. A book I read years ago but didn’t finish. Because a little bird told me that Warcross and Legend is set in the same world! & now I need to catch up.
Yes, it’s October. & yes it’s a tad late to be doing this list.
But, let me explain myself! Next weekend I turn 25! Thats a quarter of a century and am I freaking out? Maybe. (thats a definite yes for those who don’t know me)
Usually around this time of year, I get really motivated for life, I kinda treat my birthday more like New Years than New Years. Last year, I joined a gym. Legit marched down and spent 300 dollars to join a gym and pay $25 a week not to go. Money well spent obviously.
This year, I’m taking a step back and making a list of goals to revisit at actual New Years. So what’s on the list you ask?
- FIND A NEW JOB
It’s no fucking secret that I am unhappy in my current line of work. & have put in half arsed attempts in finding a new job because I was busy with life & other things. Well now I have no excuses. If I’m unhappy I need to change it!
- BE HAPPY
This past year, has probably been one of the most unhappy that I’ve had. So I need to make a conscious effort to do more things for me, to actually enjoy my life.
- LESS ANXIOUS
This one i know I can’t technically control, but I think it ties into number 2. Because when I’m not happy, it triggers a whole pile of things to be anxious about that I shouldn’t be. With this one, I’m just going to focus on trying to control the things I get anxious about.
- EARN MORE MONEY
Usually people don’t put this on lists. & YES I know money isn’t everything. But right I now I earn enough to survive. & I’m at a stage in life where I need savings and grown up things.
- ENJOY LIFE
I really need to take time and stop, and appreciate life. Because I can tell you right now, I don’t. I’m always too worried about things, planning too much into the future & general being busy. I need to take time to stop and smell the roses! Actually I hate roses, let’s smell the fresh cut grass instead!
There we have it, 5 easy (probably easier than it sounds) goals for me to follow into my 25th (26th? I never know which one it is!!) year on this planet!
It’s no secret, everyone has ‘off’ days. I especially can wake up in the mother of all bad moods and am guilty of just lounging on the couch watching YouTube videos all damn day. But I recently read some advice I wanted to share! Because it was so simple, and really applied to my moods a lot.
The advice? BE MESSY.
Need some context? I’ve chatted before on here about my frustrations with creativity & how I can lack motivation. Basically to cut a long story short, when I’m in a bad mood and try to be productive, I end up being way too hard on myself. If I make a small mistake I get angry and frustrated and wind up in a worse mood than then I started! Super fun hey?
So if I think of it the advice to be messy is perfect. If I can just get myself to a place where I can write ANYTHING and not put any pressure on myself and the blog and basically anything creative that I want to do, imagine how amazing that would be? So it’s something that I really want to work on this month!
To put this plan into action, I obviously need to be in a bad mood. Which I’m not right now.. So we play the waiting game.
Other factors I’ll be including in my plan, coffee & Spotify. Usually the music I listen to when I write is a focus or study playlist from Spotify because it’s calm, the music is already there and it has an option to keep playing similar music once a playlist is over. Which takes the decision out of it so I can just roll with it.
I want to know though, how you get out of the slump? How you stop yourself retreating into a bottomless pit of the internet or movies.