25 Confessions from my 25 Years

TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY. I’m a very youthful 25 because the years I spent smoking didn’t affect me at all. (that’s confession number 1.) & I say that with a heavy sarcasm because it did affect me! Massively! So let’s talk about the other 24 confessions!

  1. I was so eager to lose my virginity & prove a point to myself that I lost it on a couch with some dude I didn’t even really like/know.
  2. I spent 6 months arguing with my parents about my life because I was angry with what I chose to do with it. We can laugh about it now, but it was a waste of 6 months.
  3. I never thought I’d have to plan a life past 23/4/5 because I was convinced I’d never get that old. Not in a morbid way, I just wanted to be Peter Pan, I guess?
  4. I did however, have BIG plans for my early 20’s. Acting, owning a business, living in L.A. needless to say these were unrealistic and not actual dreams I’d ever want to pursue!
  5.  I’ve lied to the police about my name to get out of getting in trouble. (nothing serious it was a noise complaint & I was like 15, shat my pants and called myself Clare Lawler.)
  6. My dad left when I was 5. & the world put immense pressure on me to feel it. Even though I didn’t and I always felt like I never missed out, I felt pressured into dealing with it.. If that makes sense?
  7. In my 24th year, he got in contact with me. & I shat my pants. (PS there might be a lot of shitting pants in this post!)
  8. I used to lie to friends and family about plans I had so I could stay home and read. I have no regrets.
  9. I forced myself to be in too many relationships that kept other people happy & not me.
  10. I ended too many relationships because I was bored with the other person.
  11. I have never been in a long term relationship & currently am in my 1st. 2.5 years in I haven’t ran away yet! GO TEAM
  12. In my life, I have made many, many friends but only 5 real ones have stuck around.
  13. Parents divorcing at 23 isn’t any easier than any other age. It may in fact be worse.
  14. Sometimes when I’m sad or stressed I masturbate to calm down.
  15. Thinking of 25 confessions is fucking hard.
  16. I have a memory of sexual assault. But I was so young I don’t know if it was a dream or not. So don’t talk about it.
  17. I’ve developed an addiction to coffee! 
  18. But it’s better than my addiction to smoking which I quit btw! 
  19. I complain all the time about being chubby, but never make the changes i need to to loose the extra chub. 
  20. Realising that I’m allowed to do things for me has been life changing. 
  21. The only reason I moved to Australia was because I won a radio contest & my boyfriend at the time dumped me. 
  22. I still am not fully comfortable with my own body. Not weight wise, I mean when I look at my face or skin or hair, I don’t like it. 
  23. Contradicting 22, there are obviously days where I wake up like fuck yes I look fantastic today! & those days are the good ones. 
  24. LAST ONE. I’m in denial that I’m actually 25. & when people ask I automatically say 23. HAH I wish I was still 23 because I’m terrified of going back to uni as a late 20 something student. 

There we have it friends. 25 confessions about my 25 years on this earth as a human. 

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