I will be the first person to admit that I struggle to be all sunshine and rainbows a lot of the time. & it kills me because my teenage self was always so happy and upbeat that it feels like I lost a part of myself.
But life happens.
You can’t help but change due to circumstances, some being consequences of your actions & others being completely out of your control.
I feel like my happiness was stolen by a dynamic tag team of both these situations.
Right now, I’m on my period. Which is completely relevant to how I feel because I’m sad. Yesterday I was in a fantastic mood, I laughed louder than I had in weeks. But today, I’m full of cramps, I’m uncomfortable in my clothes and standing in work for 8 hours dealing with peoples problems that I really don’t want to because, I have my own problems.
It’s hard to stay smiling when you want to bite the head off a customer who asked for change, which I know is irrational and stupid but it’s like there’s a gremlin on my back that I can’t shake. Whose telling me to be angry with these people like it’s their fault I got my period. (obviously I am aware it’s not their fault).
The point of this wasn’t to announce to you that I have my period but actually to compile a list of things I love doing. To remind myself that it’s not all doom and gloom while I stand here, wallowing in self pity at a desk until 11PM.
- Reading (preferably in the sunshine)
- Cute stationary
- Cat with with my bae cat Theo
- Friend time with friends that live on the other side of the world
The second point of this was to ask you to share what makes you happy. What brings the light back into your dark days and reminds you to be positive?